Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize