Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
