I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize