Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
