Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
My cat gives me a boner
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
