We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
