So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
