As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
