You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm at about main and main street
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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