I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
