how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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