eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
