I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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