Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize
