Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
