mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
