I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Dick very happy bro
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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