No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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