Its about making memories worth repressing
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize