This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just blew my weed a kiss
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
im on a boat
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