my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
