It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
