i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
