party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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