Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
you never un-have a 4some
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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