My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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