just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Randomize
