"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
