Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
