Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
