I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
