the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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