he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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