just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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