He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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