Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
