Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
smell my finger.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
