did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
