I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
