Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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