on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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