I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I party with great urgency now.
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