I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
