Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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