Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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