I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
and you fell through a lawn chair
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize