Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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