you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
