Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
