No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
